Category Archives: Fatherhood

Saint Joseph: What a Special Gift – by Deacon Marty McIndoe

Angels, Anxiety and Worry, Blessed Virgin Mary, Church, Demons, Fatherhood, Healing, Holy Spirit, Jewish roots, Lent, Pope Francis, Saints, Service, Spirituality, Teaching, Vocation

St. Joseph – What a Special Gift

Today, March 19, 2021 is the Solemnity of St. Joseph occurring within the Year of St. Joseph as proclaimed by Pope Francis. This is such a special gift to the Church. For me, it is a real gift since I today completed my 33 day Consecration to St. Joseph as detailed in Father Don Colloway’s book Consecration to Saint Joseph – The Wonders of Our Spiritual Father. A few years ago I did a 33 day Consecration to Jesus through Mary and was so happy with what it did for my Spiritual Life. When Pope Francis declared this year as the Year of St. Joseph, I decided to do a consecration to St. Joseph. I am so very glad that I did. My wife and I have been doing this together using Fr. Colloway’s book and listening to his video every day on YouTube.

Father Colloway’s book has been fantastic. It is probably the best $14.95 that I have ever spent. After I fully complete the book, I plan on doing a review. His 33 day daily video series has also been amazing. Putting the two together has been wonderful. This has been one of my best Lents because of this 33 day consecration exercise. I have learned so much about St. Joseph and have come to really appreciate the gift that he is to the Church and to me personally.

St. Joseph has been in the background for so many years of the Church’s history. Many of the Saints have sung his praises, but, in general, the Church has kept him in the background. It wasn’t until a few years ago that Pope Francis added the name of St. Joseph to the Eucharistic liturgy. I still remember seeing my pastor write in the name of St. Joseph in to the book (we are a poor parish and wouldn’t order a new book just because of one insert). St. Joseph is known as the protector of the Church, but even that didn’t start until about 150 years ago. This year has been named the Year of St. Joseph by Pope Francis and the Church is celebrating it world wide. There have been a number of books, such as previously mentioned, and it would appear that St. Joseph is finally getting the attention that he should have. The timing is perfect.

2020 and 2021 have been difficult years due to the COVID pandemic. Other political changes have made life more difficult for the Church and I think that bringing out the riches of St. Joseph at this time is very appropriate. There is no doubt that the more we learn about this “silent” Saint, the more we can learn what he can do for us. Through these 33 days of consecration I have learned so much about St. Joseph and now appreciate him so much. I definitely see him as my Spiritual Father. It makes so much sense that not only would Jesus share with us His Mother, but would also share with us His earthly father. In today’s mass we read the Gospel about finding the 12 year old lost Jesus in the Temple. As I was reading it I was really “hit” by the verse where Mary said to Jesus, “Son, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been looking for you with great anxiety.” and Jesus said to them, “Why were you looking for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?” What hit me was when Mary referred to Joseph she said your father (small f) and when Jesus replied He referred to God His Father (large F). Jesus had two Fathers, one in heaven and one on the earth.

Joseph was Jesus’s father here on earth. Joseph took care of Jesus and protected Him, even moving to Egypt to avoid Herod trying to kill Jesus. St. Joseph nurtured Him and taught Him and loved Him probably better than any father cares for his own flesh and blood son. Jesus called him daddy, abba, and I can only imagine the great relationship that the two of them had. Jesus must have admired Joseph tremendously, especially for his love and devotion to Jesus’s mother, Mary. I can only believe that God chose Joseph as the “father” of Jesus because of what a great man that he was. I can only believe that Jesus and Joseph were closer than probably any other father and son. It is so important to honor a man who was given such a great honor as caring for the God-Man, Jesus.

In his book, Father Calloway is continually giving quotes from the many Saints who have had a great devotion to Joseph. They honored him as well as sought his aid in the many difficulties in their lives. Everyone needs a good father to look up to as well as to receive help from. Saint Joseph has been given to us by Jesus and it is important for us to see the gift that Saint Joseph truly is. We can most definitely use this precious gift. I would like to share with you just a few of the numerous quotes so that perhaps you will see how precious this gift is.

“This flower of Israel (St. Joseph) had the faith of Abraham, the piety of David his ancestor, the wisdom of the prophets, a patience more heroic than that of Job and Tobias, and a zeal greater than that of Elizah for the glory of God.” – Blessed Gabriele Allegra

“The holy example of Jesus Christ who, while upon earth, honored St. Joseph so highly and was obedient to him during his life should be sufficient to inflame the hearts of all with devotion to this saint.” – St. Alphonsus Liguori

“If you want to know St. Joseph’s obedience, look at how he rose at night at the angel’s voice and, giving no care to hunger, hardships, or cold, went to Egypt where he led a hard life until the next command of God” – St. Joseph Sebastian Pelzcar

“Truly, I doubt not that the angels, wondering and adoring, came thronging in countless multitudes to that poor workshop to admire the humility of him who guarded that dear and divine child, and labored at his carpenter’s trade to support the Son and the mother who were committed to his care.” – St. Francis de Sales

“Those who are devoted to prayer should, in a special manner, cherish devotion to St. Joseph. I know not how anyone can ponder on the sufferings, trials, and tribulations the Queen of the Angels endured whilst caring for Jesus in his childhood, without at the same time thanking St. Joseph for the services he rendered the Divine Child and his Blessed Mother.” – St. Teresa of Avila

“To be faithful as humble collaborators with the divine plan over our lives, we need, along with the protection of the Virgin Mary, that of St. Joseph, a most powerful intercessor.” – St. Pope John XXIII

“The Church invokes St. Joseph as her Patron and Protector through her unshakable trust that he to whom Christ willed to confide the care and protection of His own frail human childhood, will continue from heaven to perform His protective task in order to guide and defend the Mystical Body of Christ himself, which is always weak, always under attack, always in a state of peril.” St. Pope Paul VI

Ite ad Ioseph – Go to Joseph

NAVIGATING THROUGH A COVID-19 LENT – by Deacon Marty McIndoe

Church, Community, Eucharist, Fatherhood, Holiness, How to be Catholic, Lent, Liturgy, Penance and Reconciliation, Prayer, Relationships, Spirituality, Trust

Lent is a very special season of the Church where we are called to turn away from anything that is blocking our relationship to God. We are called to do whatever we can to grow closer to Him. Our God is a loving, kind and merciful Father who desires His children to be in a close relationship with him. Too often we gradually turn away from Him because of our busyness, preoccupation with other things (both good and bad), and the distractions of normal living. God’s desire is for His children to be close to Him. He is always close to us, but we often ignore that or cannot see that closeness. Lent is a time for us to try to get back on track. It is a time for us to slow down, stop being preoccupied and stop being distracted. Lent is a time for us to move closer to our Father who loves us so much, forgives us so much and desires us so much.

During Lent (and throughout the year) the Church asks us to turn towards him using three main tools, Prayer, Fasting and Alms-giving. These three tools were given to us by Jesus himself in Matthew Chapter 6. These three tools have often been called the Pillars of Lent. All three can have various means of expression and each individual has to discern the best expression for him/her within the situation they are in. This past year and in to the present year we have been experiencing many different ways of living out our lives due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Many people have had their lives completely turned around by loosing their job, having reduced hours working, or by working from home. Many parents have to deal with home schooled children for at least part of the week. We have lost the ability to gather together in large and close numbers and many families have lost their ability to be with each other even on special holidays such as Christmas and Thanksgiving and birthdays and anniversaries. Unfortunately, many families have lost loved ones due to COVID-19 and some have lost the ability to visit loved ones in nursing homes, hospitals and other institutions. There is no doubt that this pandemic has adversely affected our every day living. It will also affect the way we experience Lent. Some of this will be in negative ways, but some may actually be in positive ways.

One of the positive ways is that COVID-19 has given some people more time within their own home. Hopefully this additional time can give people time to slow down. Lent is definitely about slowing down our fast pace so that we can have more time for quiet reflection and prayer. I would like to try to take each of the three pillars and look at ways that we can use them to grow closer to God during this very difficult time.

PRAYER – We are called to be a people of prayer, every day of the year. However, during Lent we are called to find ways to expand our prayer life. The more we pray and the more we experience different forms of prayer, the closer we come to know the love of our heavenly Father. There are many forms of prayer and I would like to discuss a few. Personal spontaneous prayer is very important. For me it is the time that I spend in giving thanks and praise to God. I find that the more I give thanks to God for all the things in my life, the more I appreciate those things and feel closer to God. Praying with scripture is also a great way of experiencing God’s love and presence. Sometimes just taking a short scripture reading, perhaps one of the readings of the day, and quieting yourself and asking God to speak to us through that reading, can produce much fruit. Personal liturgical prayer is another great way to pray. This can be done by using some of the prayers that the Church has given us, such as the rosary, the chaplet of divine mercy, the liturgy of the hours, litanies, etc. These can really help us feel closer to God. Public liturgical prayer is also very important such as attending mass more often, attending Adoration and Benediction and other church prayers. Our churches all adhere to social distancing and to cleaning and are probably one of the safer public places to be. For Lent, try to attend mass or services as often as you can.

FASTING – Fasting has been part of the Christian life since the time of the early church. Even before that it was an important part of the Jewish tradition. Fasting, or giving up something, can definitely help us to grow closer to God. Sometimes when giving up food for a short time, the hunger we feel in our stomach can help us better appreciate the hunger that we have for God. But fasting is not just for food. Fasting can be from things in our lives that do not lead us closer to God. Often fasting is something that goes along with adding something. For instance, if you fast from watching tv for just one hour per day and take that one hour per day and add scripture reading and/or prayer you will see how that additional hour of scripture and or prayer can bring you closer to God. Also, fasting from something that you really love can be difficult but can help you build your own self control which can be useful in many ways.

ALMS-GIVING – Alms-giving is simply giving something that you have to the poor. It can be the gift of money, goods, or time. Both the Old and New Testaments (the Hebrew and Christian scriptures) stress how important it is for us to share with others, especially with the poor. In today’s COVID world I have experienced a new kind of poor (or needy). There are a large number of people who had great jobs or owned great businesses that all of a sudden, because of COVID have lost their jobs and their businesses or have at least had a reduction of income. They own nice homes and drive nice cars but can’t afford to put food on the table and can’t afford to pay their bills. These people, by all outward appearances do not need help but in reality are very much in need of help. Many of them are embarrassed to ask for help. We need to find ways to help them too. Personally I have found that the more I give to others who are in need, the closer I feel to God. I mentioned that giving can consist of money, goods or time. Money and goods are always something that you can get more of. However time is something that can not be replenished. Giving of your time, such as volunteering at soup kitchens, outreaches, or other charitable organizations is a real gift and a real sacrifice. At the same time it is the most rewarding.

SUMMARY – Remember that Lent is a gift given to you to help you get closer to our Father who loves us so much and wants us to be close to him. Jesus taught us the three Pillars of Lent that can help us do that. The more we put those Pillars in to action the closer we will get to God. COVID has taken so much away from us and we are really hurting from it. Now more than ever, we need to be close to God. I pray that you have a very fruitful Lent and that you better understand the great riches of being a son and daughter of the Father. I pray that you know the closeness that only a son and daughter can feel. May God bless you richly during this most Holy Season.

I’M CATHOLIC. NOW WHAT? By Shaun McAfee – a book review by Deacon Marty McIndoe

Abortion, Apologetics, Blessed Virgin Mary, Book Review, Church, Community, Converts, Creation, Death and Dying, Demons, Diaconate, Divine Mercy, Early Church Fathers, Easter, Ethics, Eucharist, Evangelism, Family, Fatherhood, Forgiveness, Gnosticism, Healing, Heresy, Holiness, Holy Orders, Holy Spirit, How to be Catholic, Lent, Life in the Spirit, Liturgy, Marriage, Miracles, Morality, Mystagogy, New Age, Penance and Reconciliation, Pope Francis, Prayer, Priesthood, Pro-Life, Purgatory, Relationships, Relics, Resurrection, Rosary, Sacraments, Saints, Scripture, Service, Sin, Social Media, Spirituality, Teaching, Trust, Vocation, Women, , ,

I’M CATHOLIC.  NOW WHAT?   By Shaun McAfee – a book review by Deacon Marty McIndoe

Shaun McAfee, founder of EpicPew.com, blogger at National Catholic Register, contributor to Catholic Answers Magazine and many other Catholic resources has written a new book published by Our Sunday Visitor.  Personally I think that this is the best book he has written; and I really enjoyed his other books.  When I first saw the pre-publication announcement for this book, I immediately put in an order for it.  The title and description led me to believe that this book would be a great resource for my parish RCIA program.  I have been involved in the RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults) program for many years and know that those who have gone through it need a really good resource book to continue their journey after the time in the program has finished.  After reading this book I not only realized that the book is perfect for that, but that the book is perfect for all Catholics on their journey of living out the beauty of the Catholic faith.

The author of this book is a convert and has gone through the RCIA process to become a Catholic.  How I wish that all of the people who go through RCIA become as good a Catholic as Shaun and his wife have become.  Shaun’s overall knowledge of the Catholic faith and Catholic Theology (he has a graduate degree from Holy Apostles College) is amazing.  The way he lives out that faith with his wife and family is even more amazing.  Faith is made to be put in to action and Shaun certainly does that.  I have followed Shaun and his family on Facebook for almost six years and although I have never met him in person, I see the faith filled life that he leads.  That faith filled life pours over in to this book.  Shaun tells us all the things we need to know to be a good Catholic and he gives us personal examples of how to be a good Catholic.

This 335 page book consists of 100 chapters that give us a lot of information on the Catholic Church and why we do the things that we do.  I find it very refreshing that he takes the times to not only tell us the things that we should be doing to be a good Catholic, but also tells us why we do those things.  He often refers to the Holy Scriptures as well as the Catechism of the Catholic Church.  He also uses stories from the early church Fathers and the Saints to explain.   Besides that, he gives us plenty of personal examples from his own life.  He covers just about everything that you can think of that speaks of Catholicism.  He not only covers different topics but also gives us things to do.  For example, not only do we learn about Baptism, but he also gives us ideas on how to celebrate our Baptism day.  He talks to us about the priesthood and then encourages us to invite a priest over for dinner.

Shaun’s section on BEING A MODERN CATHOLIC has so much richness to it when discussing evil, relativism (a must read), marriage, sexuality, abortion, euthanasia, immigration, gossiping, giving, and consumerism.  His discussion of the current sex abuse scandal and cover up is enlightening.  He deals with all of the current issues in the Church today.  His way of facing these issues clearly shows the HOPE that we as Catholics are called to have.  Shaun ends his book with a section on EVANGELIZATION: IT’S FOR EVERYONE.  The chapters in this section remind us of our calling as Catholics to share the Good News that we have received.  He explains the “New Evangelization” and encourages us to reach out to those around us, especially to our children.

I highly recommend that ALL Catholics read this book.  The book covers serious subjects but is very easy to read.  It is informative as well as interesting.  It is a wealth of information on the Catholic faith.  This book is not only for those who have just recently come in to the Church, although it is great for them, but it is for all of us on our journey towards Jesus in His Church.  We can all benefit from the explanations and the suggestions that Shaun makes in this book.  As I write this, we are approaching the LENTEN season.  I highly suggest that every Catholic get this book and read it and study it and live it out for Lent.  It might be the best thing that you ever did for Lent.

Hidden Slaughter – by Deacon Marty McIndoe

Community, Death and Dying, Ethics, Family, Fatherhood, Pro-Life, Relationships, Women,

The Hidden Slaughter – by Deacon Marty McIndoe

All of us are aware of those things that can kill us.  Heart disease, cancer, accidents, chronic respiratory disease, stroke, Alzheimer’s, diabetes, influenza and pneumonia are listed by Google (in that order) as the leading causes of death in the United States.  The World Health Organization lists the world wide death causes that are about the same as the US but with the addition of diarrheal diseases and Tuberculosis.  Neither list mentions THE LEADING cause of death worldwide in that list.  It seems to be a word that no one wants to mention, a word that everyone wants to hide.  But the Breitbart News Agency did expose it to the public using statistics from the World Health Agency.

On 31 December 2018, the Breitbart.com website reported under the headline “Abortion Leading Cause of Death in 2018 with 41 Million Killed” that “there have been some 41.9 million abortions performed in the course of the year,” making abortion “the number one cause of death worldwide in 2018, with more than 41 million children killed before birth.”  They also said that the World Health Organization indicated that between the years 2010 and 2014 WORLDWIDE abortions averaged 56 million per year.  Here in the United States our abortion rates have dropped from a high of about 1.6 million per year to about 900,000 per year.  Since the 1973 Supreme Court decision, we have had over 60 million abortions in the United States.  Certainly there are often discrepancies with statistics and who reports them, but even the CDC reports over 600,000 thousand annual abortions in the US.  These are medically produced and don’t include chemically induced.   Whatever way you look at it, abortion is killing off a huge amount of our babies.  Here in the United States we kill about 2,000 babies every day through abortion.   Worldwide we kill about 125,000 to 150,000 per day.  This is most definitely a hidden slaughter.

Statistics can help us to better understand what we are doing.  When we read the statistics on abortion, we have a tendency to be numbed by the figures and really don’t think about it.  We don’t see the abortions happening (thankfully) and they aren’t real to us.  Whenever we are at war the news broadcasters give us all of the news about the war, often including pictures.  We are horrified by the casualties of our soldiers, as we should be.  If you look at the statistics of war in comparison to abortion, you can start to realize the horrors that are there.  In 18 years of war in Afghanistan we lost about 2,216 soldiers.  That equals the number of deaths in about one day of abortions in the United States, and 30 minutes worth worldwide.  In the 14 years of the Vietnam War we lost about 58,000 soldiers.  It takes only about one month of US abortions to reach the same number, and one half day worldwide.

The number of babies that are killed before they are given the chance to be born is staggering.  I can’t help but to think of that loss to our society.   How many geniuses did we kill?   How many musical virtuosos did we kill?  How many researchers that could help us rid the world of cancer and disease and hunger did we kill?  We will never know because they are gone.  Every life, whether it be from a developed country like the USA, or a developing country, is important.  Every unborn baby, whether wanted or unwanted by his or her parents, is a gift from God who deserves the chance to become the person that God calls them to be.  Society has the responsibility of protecting its weakest members and helping them to reach their potential.  We, as a human family, have to protect the unborn and have to help them grow.  Our Declaration of Independence so rightly says, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”  The first of the listed unalienable right is LIFE.  The government must protect this right given to us from God.

Unfortunately our government, and many others, has turned away from being held responsible for preserving the right of Life.  They have turned instead to preserving the right to choice and convenience.  This is not what God intended.  The most important gift given to us is our Life.  The scriptures are so clear about our God being a God of Life and how precious life is, even in the womb.  God tells us in scripture, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”  Yet today in many abortions we reach up in to that sacred life giving womb and tear apart our own babies limb by limb and crush their heads to kill them, all because they are an inconvenience.   This is a barbaric slaughter often instituted by those who are called to be protectors.   What kind of society do we have where we allow this, and often encourage this?

As a Catholic deacon, I personally have come in to contact with several women who have had abortions.  Their life circumstances seemed to dictate to them at the time that they had to have the abortion.  Sadly, even many years or decades after the abortion they are very troubled by what they did.  The abortion not only killed their child, but it also put a very dark hole within them that is hard to climb out of.  I really feel for these women.  I have also counseled several men who had this same dark hole because their baby had been aborted by the mother.  Some of them were part of the decision and some of them fought the decision.  Either way, they were troubled for many years by the abortion.

We as a society need to protect the unborn.  We need to pass laws that prohibit abortion.  We also need to find ways to make changes to the life circumstances that cause a mother to even consider an abortion.  We also need to set up programs to help women raise their children, especially when they live in poverty.  There is no doubt that this is a costly and difficult thing to do, but it is well worth the cost and the difficulty.   Our society can only benefit from doing this.  We can benefit from seeing the sacredness of Life and the sacredness of helping children grow in to what God calls them to be.

I need to add one more factor that leads towards the high abortion rates.  In the USA we have a very powerful entity called Planned Parenthood.  They have considerable political power and have even been embraced by one of our major political parties.  They have many wealthy friends and many influential friends in Hollywood and in the major networks and publications.  They promote abortion.  Their 2019 report (years 2017-2018) shows that abortion is their core mission.  Planned Parenthood performed 332,757 abortions during the reported year, the most the abortion giant has reported since 2011-2012.  In contrast, non-abortion services have declined.  The report also showed record-high numbers in national office and affiliate financial income for 2018.

  • Almost $1.9 billion in net assets, up from $1.6 billion in 2017.
  • $563.8 million in taxpayer funding, up from $543.7 billion in 2017.
  • $1.67 billion in total revenue, up from $1.46 billion in 2017.
  • Almost $245 million in excess of revenue over expenses, more than double the $98.5 million reported in 2017.
  • $630.8 million in private contributions (including grants, individual contributors, bequests, and corporate contributors), up from $532.7 million in 2017.

In spite of increased income and $245 million dollars in excess of revenue over expenses, they keep getting our taxpayer money.

The founder of Planned Parenthood, Margaret Sanger, was a racist who wanted “the gradual suppression, elimination and eventual extinction, of defective stock”.  She said, “We don’t want the word to go out that we want to exterminate the Negro population…” ( Letter to Dr. Clarence J. Gamble, December 10, 1939, p. 2).  They are doing a great job of that.  Even though blacks make up about 12 percent of our population, 36 percent of PP abortions are from black women.  In NYC this jumps to over 46 per cent.  If you want to learn more about Margaret Sanger, look up “Margaret Sanger Quotes” on google.com.  For obvious reasons, Planned Parenthood likes to distance themselves from their founder.

Pope John Paul II referred to us as being in a “Culture of Death”.   Our sobering statistics tell us that he was correct.  We, no matter what our religion, should see Life as an important gift to be preserved and cherished.  This means saying no to abortion but it also means saying yes to social programs that help families to become the best they can be.  It also means saying no to Euthanasia.  Life is important and precious from conception to Natural Death.  We in the United States should work on promoting Life here, but we also must work on promoting it worldwide.  We need to develop a “Culture of Life” and get rid of this hidden slaughter that plagues our world.

Unplanned: A film about Love, Mercy, and Forgiveness By Tom Perna

Abortion, Anxiety and Worry, Book Review, Family, Fatherhood, Healing, Marriage, Morality, Movie Reviews, Pro-Life

Ever since we started hearing about the film on how Abby Johnson left the abortion industry, my wife and I have been talking about seeing it. I wasn’t completely positive what the theatre release was going to be for the film, but over the last week, my wife kept seeing that it was going to be in a theatre close to our home. At the beginning of the week, we decided to go see the film on Thursday night. Not knowing what to expect, we entered the theatre, watched the previews, and then, as the film began…our senses were shocked.

Without giving away too much of the film, one of the first scenes in the movie is a pivotal scene. It’s a scene that stays in your mind throughout the film, and it rocks you again as the storyline of the film catches back up with that scene. As I reflect on what we witnessed last night, I can see very clearly the scene and still feel the raw emotions that came pouring forth from my eyes and my heart. The last time I had tears in my eyes in the film this much was when I watched the Passion of the Christ. Tears poured from my eyes and down my cheeks for nearly ¾ of this film.

I found this film difficult at times to watch, but also realized that it must be seen by as many people as possible on both sides of this debated subject. The film is truly a testimony of love, mercy and forgiveness. Although I could put into words exactly what I mean by those three points, it would be better if you went and saw the film yourself. I can tell you that my wife and I held hands nearly the entire film, especially in the scenes that are truly hard to endure. Thoughts of my unborn child growing in my wife’s womb flooded my mind different times in the film and I often looked over at my wife and her bump/belly.

As a Catholic man, who is now a husband, and soon-to-be father, one point that kept coming back to me (and my wife and I talked about it in the car on the way home) was the unshakable support and love that Abby’s husband gave to her, even loving her and marrying her when they had opposing views on Abortion. I personally know Doug, and although I don’t know him incredibly well, what I do know of him was reflected in this film perfectly. He is the unshakable foundation of his family and rock that always has Abby’s back.

I highly encourage you to see the film this weekend. Opening weekends and the first week for films are important because it will determine if the film will remain in the theaters on a long-term basis. If you have children that are 17 years of age and under and you are hesitant to bring them to this film, let me say that the “R-Rating” this film was given is a farce. I have seen more graphic images in PG-13 films than what is in this one. Furthermore, there are more graphic images of aborted babies online than in this film.

If you have the means to do so, I would also encourage you to support 40 Days For Life and Abby’s organization, And Then There Were None. Get involved with your local Pro-Life activities and pray, pray, pray for end to Abortion.

From Selling Abortions to Sidewalk Counseling – by Doug Johnson

Abortion, Books, Community, Family, Fatherhood, Marriage, Morality, Pro-Life, , ,

From Selling Abortions To Sidewalk Counseling – by Doug Johnson

For the entire 8 years my wife was involved with Planned Parenthood, her primary job was to sell an abortion to every pregnant woman who walked into the clinic. Even as a volunteer, Abby’s job was to make women feel safe and comfortable as they walked through the doors of Planned Parenthood for their abortion. No matter what her title was, the push was always for abortion, because that is where the money is. When she was an escort, get them in the door. When she was working the front counter, smile, tell them the protesters are nuts, and get the money. When she was in charge of community outreach, Abby was passing out condoms to coeds, giving “sex ed” talks that resulted in new customers, and doing everything she could to normalize abortion. Finally, when she became the clinic director, here’s your abortion quota, Abby!!!

Abby’s first priority and passion project when she left the abortion industry was praying outside of clinics and sidewalk counseling. It wasn’t speaking or writing a book. It wasn’t her movie or starting a ministry to help other clinic workers leave the abortion industry. All that came later. What really motivated her was the opportunity to come face to face with women and sharing the truth about abortion. To tell them what really happens behind the doors of an abortion clinic. She racked up a lot of hours in that first year. I’m not sure why, but it was well over a year before I ever even got to see her live and in action outside of a clinic. The first time I saw Abby get a save… I was in awe. I was inspired. I couldn’t have prepared for how powerful that moment would be and the impact it would have on me supporting my wife moving forward.

It was going to be a normal Saturday with my wife. We were headed to the Austin area in Texas for some reason or another. Who knows? Probably to see friends and maybe do some house hunting. Before we could get to the fun stuff, we needed to stop and drop some materials off with volunteers outside of the Whole Women’s Health in Austin. There were a couple of familiar faces outside the clinic praying, and they told Abby that they were performing abortions that day. Whelp, our leisurely day was going to have to take a pause. It was go time for Abby.

“Ok. Then we are staying until the last customer leaves.”

Now, I had zero experience in this department. I could pray, but I wasn’t about to try my hand at sidewalk counseling. I stood back by the road and watched Abby go to work. The CONFIDENCE she had to call out to everyone that walked in? I was blown away. She knew what to say, how to say it, and how to respond to anything that came her way. I mean, I have always known Abby is a bad-ass, but this was just a cool moment.

We had only been there for about 30 minutes when a couple pulled into the lot and parked right behind the fence facing the sidewalk. A woman stepped out of the passenger side and made a b-line for the building. Her head down and she was clinching her purse. My wife didn’t have an opportunity to say anything to her because just as she was scurrying off, her husband was pointing a finger at us and the first words out of his mouth where…

“You know what? You guys are assholes! You are wasting you’re time and you can’t change my mind!!” 

At first, I took this as a personal affront to my wife. How dare this dude address my wife and the other women like that?! Fortunately, I had seen my bride handle confrontation before.  Still,  I positioned myself just close enough to hear the conversation, but not close enough to escalate things. Besides, I could tell that he was only being protective of his wife. I’m sure he told his wife to hurry in while he distracted us. He didn’t actually want to get into a fight with anyone. Either way, if he was just running interference, he chose the wrong gal to wag his finger at, because it was Abby’s turn to talk.

I don’t remember any exact words. I don’t even remember if Abby started with her experiences in the abortion industry, or if she asked if that was his wife, or if she asked him why he automatically assumed that she’s an “asshole.” She may have started out asking what year his Camero was.  My memory picks up somewhere in the middle. Abby managed to keep him engaged in idle conversation and it didn’t take long for his aggressive tone to fade. I remember him saying that the woman was his wife, this wasn’t their first abortion, and that he was a professional MMA fighter. Then I remember Abby asking him about the medallions he wore around his neck. They were saints and they were given to him by his aunt. Abby asked him what his aunt would think about him being here for an abortion, and he said she would be pretty disappointed. I’ll never forget the next thing that came out of his mouth…

“I actually DON’T want her to have an abortion, but it’s up to her, right?” 

In my brain, there were thousands of voices yelling, NO!!! It is not just up to her!!! That is your wife and child in there. That is your family. If you’re a fighter, then why don’t you go in there and fight for your family. I bet she is in there waiting for you to man up and lead. Tell her you want a family. Tell her you’re committed . Just say something. Anything!! Don’t just leave her alone to figure this out.

Abby handled it much better than I would have. She asked him if he had told her about his objection to her getting an abortion. He said, no. Abby told him, “You need to share your feelings with her. She is your WIFE and this is a conversation you need to have before it’s too late. Go be her husband. She needs you.”

They didn’t say much more before he went in to talk to his wife. About an hour later, they walked out holding hands and looking very at ease. She still didn’t say anything to us, but she smiled at Abby as she got into the car. He looked like he was going to get into the car without saying anything, but he paused. He told us that they were going to lunch and they weren’t coming back. They had decided AGAINST getting an abortion. Abby just smiled and congratulated them. He nodded at us and got in the car. They drove away, and we never saw them again.

I was in such awe of what I had just seen. My wife, a woman that had spent so many years selling abortions had just saved a life. So this is what conversion and change of heart looks like. So this is what it looks like when God recruits you and you accept. You get to save lives.

On a side note: I HATE that even in an equal partnership, men feel silenced about abortion. I guess that’s why I remember this story so well. Men should have a say on the issue of abortion. Not just pro-abortion men. Not just anti-abortion men. ALL MEN!!! Maybe if we stepped up our game, women would feel more supported and never even consider abortion if they knew we were committed. I believe women should lead the conversation, but that doesn’t exclude men in their responsibilities regarding families and abortion.

Check out Doug’s blog at: https://www.dougontap.com/

The Birth of Mary and the Protoevangelium of James by Deacon Marty McIndoe

Angels, Blessed Virgin Mary, Church, Early Church Fathers, Family, Fatherhood, Holy Spirit, Jewish roots, Liturgy, Marriage, Miracles, Prayer, Relationships, Saints, Scripture

If we asked most Catholics who Mary’s parents were they would probably answer Anna and Joachim. But if we look in the Holy Bible there is no mention of Mary’s birth or the name of her parents. So how do we know their names? The simple answer is through tradition. As Catholics, we believe that God reveals His truths to us through the Holy Bible AND through tradition. Tradition was sacred to the Jews (we all know that great song from Fiddler on the Roof) and is also sacred to us. St. Paul tells us to “stand firm and hold to the traditions which you were taught by us, either by word of mouth or by letter” (2 Thess. 2:15).
On September 8th we celebrate the birthday of Mary. This is exactly nine months after we celebrate the Feast of the Immaculate Conception on December 8th. This feast was celebrated no later than the 6th century. An eastern Saint, St. Romanos, a deacon who composed numerous liturgical songs, wrote a hymn celebrating the birthday of Mary. The hymn was quite popular and used in liturgies to celebrate the birthday of Mary which helped lead us to the feast day. The Eastern Churches first celebrated it and then within a century the Roman Church celebrated it. St. Romanos relied heavily upon the apocryphal writing, The Protoevangelium of St. James, in composing the lyrics to his hymn on the Nativity of Mary.
As an apocryphal writing, we must realize that the Church decided that this book was not inspired as scripture and it was not placed in the canon of the bible. However, this writing has been seen as a good source of tradition from the earliest times of the Church. Most scholars believe that it was composed around 145 AD. Because of this, and the language structure, we know that St. James did not write it. However it came from an area where St. James had followers and there may be some things passed on from him in the writing. In view of all of this, and with a certain amount of caution, I would like to share some of the points covered in the Protoevangelium concerning Mary and her birth and upbringing.
The Protoevangelium does repeat many items found in the scriptures concerning Mary and the birth of Jesus. But it adds details prior to that not mentioned in the sacred scriptures. It tells us that her parents were named Joachim and Anna and that Joachim and Anna were unable to conceive for many years and that both of them became depressed at not being able to have children. It tells us that Joachim became so depressed that he went out to the desert to live in solitude in a tent where he fasted for 40 days and 40 nights pleading with God. At the same time, Anna grieved not having Joachim with her and not being able to become pregnant. She prayed that God would bless her as He had blessed Sarah with Isaac. The Protoevangelium tells us that an angel appeared to Anna and told her that God had heard her prayer and that “you shall conceive and bring forth; and your seed shall be spoken of in all the world”.
About the same time, an angel appeared to Joachim and told him that God had heard his prayers. He was told to go to Anna and that Anna would conceive a child. Nine months later Anna gave birth to a little girl and they name her Mary. The Protoevangelium tells us that at the birth Anna said, “My soul has been magnified this day.” The writings go on to say that Mary walked at six months old. When she was one year old, Joachim held a great birthday feast for Mary and invited the priests, scribes and elders and all the people of Israel. The priests blessed Mary saying, “O God of our fathers, bless this child and give her an everlasting name to be named in all generations”.
The Protoevangelium tells us that at the age of three Joachim and Anna took Mary to the temple to be raised there hoping that her heart would be captivated by the Temple. When they gave her to the priest he kissed her and blessed her saying, “The Lord has magnified your name in all generations. In you, on the last of the days, the Lord will manifest His redemption to the sons of Israel.” The priest put her down on the third step and the grace of God came upon her and Mary danced with joy and the people loved her.
The Protoevangelium goes on to tell us that Mary stayed in the temple until she was 12 years old. At that time the chief priest received a visit from an angel while in the Holy of Holies telling him to assemble the widowers of the people and that God would give a sign as to which widower He chose for Mary. When all of the widowers assembled the High Priest again prayed to God for a sign to show which widower would receive Mary as his wife. When a dove appeared and landed on Joseph’s head, the high priest declared him to be the one who was chosen. At first Joseph declined saying that he had children and was an old man and it wasn’t good for him to take such a young girl. The chief priest reminded Joseph that it was God’s will and Joseph said to Mary, “Behold I have received you from the temple of the Lord; and now I leave you in my house and go away to build my buildings, and I shall come to you. The Lord will protect you”.
As interesting as all this is, we must remember that the Church refused to recognize the Protoevangelium as sacred scripture. We cannot be sure of any truth found here, but as I said earlier, this is a very early writing that passes on at least some of the tradition handed down about our beloved mother, Mary. It might help us imagine a little better the life of the most significant woman who ever walked the earth (and rule in Heaven). Hail Mary full of grace…….
As Saint Augustine said, “She is the flower of the field from whom bloomed the precious lily of the valley. Through her birth the nature inherited from our first parents is changed.”
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOTHER MARY….WE LOVE YOU

 

3 EASY THINGS EVERY DAD SHOULD BE DOING – By Adam Minihan

Church, Family, Fatherhood, Marriage, Uncategorized

AdamAndFamily

 

Full disclaimer, I am a “new dad”.  I don’t have 5, 10, or 15 years of experience under my belt. I have 4 children, a 3 year old son Luke, a 1.5 year old son Jude, one baby in heaven, and one baby on the way! I am constantly learning how to be the best dad I can be, with many of these learning moments coming from my faults. With that being said, I am not writing this attempting to fool anyone into thinking I have this whole dad thing figured out (I mean, we haven’t even hit the rebellious teenage years yet.).  Nonetheless, I write this with conviction as I have witnessed many authentic, God-fearing, wife-loving, child-raising fathers in my life, my own father being a prime example.

Here’s 3 easy things every dad should be doing:

1. Love your wife. Children are so observant. I am constantly amazed when I hear one of my boys attempting to hum a song I was humming 2 minutes ago.  Or after dinner when I start taking dishes to the sink, being followed by Luke and/or Jude, with a cup in hand, hurling his cup into the sink attempting to do his part. Our kids watch and replicate so many of our actions which is why they need to see their dad loving their mom.  My sons will learn how to treat women by observing how I treat their mother.  Likewise, if I am blessed to have a daughter(s), she will learn how she should be respected and the inherent dignity she has as a woman by the amount of respect and dignity I show her mother.

2. Have family prayer.  Servant of God Father Patrick Peyton famously said, “The family that prays together stays together”.  If you don’t have a family prayer routine, start small and continue building up. As the spiritual leader of the home, lead your family in prayer before meals. At first it may seem awkward and uncomfortable but typically that discomfort is only on your end. Push through that discomfort and it will soon become as natural as breathing.

When it’s the kiddo’s bedtime, we all have nightly routines. Take a bath, brush teeth, comb hair, get pajamas on, and maybe a bedtime story. Before that bedtime story, you, your wife and children kneel down by their bed and have a bedtime prayer. It can be as simple as, “Now I lay me, down to sleep. I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.” It’s quick and easy but sets an example of praying before bed… an example that I carried on from when my parents taught me.

3. Bless your children. Before my boys go to sleep or any time I have to leave for a couple days on business, I make the sign of the cross on their forehead while praying, “May almighty God bless and keep you and may you always stay under the protection of our Mother Mary.” It’s quick and simple. Takes me all of 5 seconds. Our Lord ordained men as heads of the Domestic Church, which is a miniature of the Universal Church. This means each man is a priest of his home. A great way to embrace the role as a priest of your family is by blessing your children. My boys have come to love and expect this nightly ritual and always give me a happy grin as I pray it. (For a great book on this topic, Click here.)

 

About Adam Minihan:
Adam is the Vice President of an award-winning local Catholic radio station and the host of The Catholic Man Show. Adam and his best friend/co-host, David Niles, had 0 experience in the radio business before being presented with the opportunity to start a Catholic station in 2014. Taking a leap of faith, they launched St. Michael Catholic Radio and it has now grown into covering the whole Tulsa Market, airing multiple local programs, and carrying EWTN content.  Adam is married to his beautiful bride Haylee and they have 2 young boys Luke and Jude. They live in Tulsa, OK where they are active in many Catholic bible studies, church functions, apologetic groups, and Cursillo. You can follow Adam on twitter or like St. Michael Catholic radio on Facebook!

 

A Father of 23 Children Looks at Father’s Day – by Deacon Bob Mongillo

Family, Fatherhood, Marriage, Peace and Justice

DadMongillo2Deacon Bob and Barbara Mongillo and their family

When Deacon Marty asked me to write about being a father, and fatherhood, I was both honored and humbled that he asked me.  As I was thinking about what to write, in a limited amount of words, I began to put my thoughts together.

As I began to compose this, I am sitting in the surgery waiting room at St Charles Hospital after just kissing my daughter Ivana good bye as she went into surgery.  And two thoughts came into my mind; fatherhood is sometimes when you have to make choices and put those you love dearly in the hands of professionals, who are Gods helping and gifted hands here on Earth.

Today, Friday, Ivana has surgery and Kyle graduates from grammar school.  How I wish I could split myself in two but that is not possible.  So, one of the characteristics of being a father is making choices.  I so wanted to see Kyle walk down that aisle, after learning how to walk after 10 years, and being a successful recipient of a kidney transplant almost 4 years ago. Thank God for technology!!

I can probably be most effective about my experiences of being a father by telling you my story.  Next week it will be 36 years since I married my childhood sweetheart, Barbara.  Together we have 23 children. 6 biological children and 17 adopted special needs children. But we never make any distinction between the two. They are all Mongillo’s.  I love being a Dad. I never imagined that I would be a father to this number, but if I had to do it again, I would do it all again the same way.

My Dad was a traditional Dad. He was the breadwinner and Mom was the nurturer.  I am completely the opposite of that.  I love being a part of the everyday lives of my children.  I love sharing in their triumphs and always support them and sometimes have to get them back on their feet when the chips are down.

I always try to see the good and positive in each one of them.  I also strive to give them wings so they can too can become better Moms and Dads.  And, soon becoming a Grandpa for the sixth time, is a gift.

Both Barbara and I try to plant a seed in each one of them.  And we are blessed to see the fruit of these seeds in their actions and words.  Being a Dad is a true gift from God.  There are not enough words to describe this role. Being successful in my career was important, but far less important than being a good father.  God has been good to me and blessed me.  He has helped us in our time of need.  When three of our children were called home to God, He gave us, and continues to give us, the strength to cope with loss.  So, as we set aside this special day to honor Dads, I wish all the Dads blessings today and every day.

DadMongilo familyBob and Barbara’s children in their home.

DadHookedOnA very special gift.

 

Deacon Bob Mongillo is currently a deacon at St. Francis de Sales Parish in Patchogue, NY.   He was Born in Woodhaven, Queens, NY and married Barbara in June 1980.  He is the father of 23 children.  He lived in East Meadow for 22 years before moving to Patchogue.  He was ordained a deacon in May 2001 from St Raphael’s, East Meadow.  He served as Deacon, Business Mgr and Director of Parish Social Ministry, St Rosalie parish in Hampton Bays, NY  for 10 years.